


Goddess or Angel

by koi_choshi



Category: AKB48
Genre: Angels, F/F, POV First Person, Supernatural - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-24
Updated: 2016-12-24
Packaged: 2018-09-11 16:45:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8998819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/koi_choshi/pseuds/koi_choshi
Summary: Sae was always filled with loneliness until one day, someone fell by her abode. Is she a goddess or an angel?





	1. Goddess or Angel?

**Author's Note:**

> My entry for Contest48 posted last 6 April 2012

She woke up from her sleep as she felt the first rays of the sun touch her face. She had left the window open because she was too tired to close them the night before.

“Good morning, Tomodachi…” she greeted to her only real friend, a lifeless object that listened to her every night after she went back home. I observed her silently as she yawned and stepped out of her bed. For one moment, my heart skipped as she looked into my eyes and smiled. However, I remembered that it was impossible for her to see me.

She did not even know that I was there.

“You know what, Tomodachi?” she said in her muffled voice as she brushed her teeth. “Last night I dreamed about a goddess.” She stupidly grinned at the doll and proceeded with her musings. “She had a very long wonderful hair and she’s very beautiful… like a goddess!”

After washing up and choosing what to wear, a very colorful combination that would make a normal person’s eyebrow rise, she thought a bit. “She’s wearing a white dress though, maybe she’s a ghost!” she shivered cutely. I looked at my dress. Do I look like a ghost?

This is bad…

Do beings like us supposed to have these kinds of feelings? I’ve been watching over her since she was a child. I saw everything that had happened to her life: her happiness, and her misery. I know the secrets behind that _genki_ smile that she always had.

Today was actually a normal day for her. She was in a good mood so that made me smile a bit. I accompanied her to her work, not flying too high as I want to be just beside her. She greeted people she knew along the way, smiling tirelessly at them.

I couldn’t help but still be amazed with her energy. She had two part-time jobs for that day and I just followed her around as she smiled and served the customers. Sometimes she would look beside her and as if she was seeing me, she smiles goofily.

I couldn’t help but feel nervous when she does that.

“I’m so sorry…” she apologized repeatedly. The owner of the shop was shouting at her.

“Work faster, Miyazawa! Our customers are getting angry!”

“Yes…” she said in an exhausted voice. She was obviously tired, I thought. But she had to work hard. She had to push herself to her limit. She went around the small, noisy bar, distributing the orders.

If only I can help her, I would. She forced herself to smile even though some of the customers were yelling at her.

“Ahhh… I’m sorry!” she said as she accidentally spilled beer on a customer’s lap. The man seemed drunk. I had to rush nearer.

“You twerp!” he shouted as he swung a bottle over her dangerously.

“Sae!” I exclaimed, going towards her and embracing her tight. After all, it was my job to protect her anyway.

It would be dumb if the bottle would just bounce off by some invisible force but by my intervention, another man came to stop the drunkard from hurting Sae.

“I think you should go home for now,” the shop owner said.

I hovered behind her as she walked home, shaking due to fear.

Why should she be scared? I’m just here beside her always.

***

I think it was a short dream or maybe I was seeing things. As the man was about to hit me with that bottle, I felt warmth, like someone hugged me. I felt faint, and then I saw her.

The goddess that was in my dream. She was looking at me with worried eyes. She was whispering my name, too.

I stopped walking for a bit and looked around. No one was around.

I reached my apartment. Sitting on the small bed and sighing, “Ne, Tomodachi,” I asked. “Why are my days ending like this always?” I said, tears threatening to fall down. Leaning at the headboard, I hid her face between her knees and cried.  “I’m no good… I’m always no good…”

I clutched Tomodachi as I cried. I was so tired of everything…

“I’m no good… I’m not good for anyone… I’m just here, all alone…” I sobbed. “What I only have is this stupid little doll…” I said painfully as I threw my inanimate friend on the bed.

***

I was bothered, really bothered.

I had to watch over Sae but at the same time, I wanted to leave. I was not supposed to feel anything but it felt painful as she cried her heart out.

But that was the first time she spoke her heart out. She would cry silently but she wouldn’t say anything. This was the first time I’ve heard her pleas. I had no power to read her mind. I cautiously wrapped my arms around her. It was embarrassing but I didn’t have any other way to console her.

“I wish I could spend my life with someone who would never leave me… And then… I would be happy…”

_“But I would always be here with you forever…”_ I thought miserably. That was the first time I’ve heard her wish, the reason for her silent tears behind that energetic smile.

I would give everything to see her smile for real, forever.

After Sae fell asleep, her cheeks glowing with the traces of her tears, I flew out of her window. On top of the highest tower, Yuko and Atsuko greeted me as they both descended, their wings folding behind their backs.

“I know what you want to do,” Atsuko said with a sad smile. “Are you sure?”

I was anxious. “I cannot stand looking at her like that always.”

“Is there no other way?” Yuko whispered sadly.

Atsuko  shook her head. “She came here knowing what you want to do.” She placed her hand on my shoulder. “Is there something stopping you?”

“I fear that I wouldn’t be able to protect her anymore…”

“You did your job very well,” she replied. I left my charge’s room with my made-up mind. But then I was also afraid to sacrifice. What a coward…

“All I wish is that for her to be happy…” I said, my hands on my chest.

“What would you give in exchange for your wish…?” Yuko gasped as my reply came out.

“My wings…”

As my feathers slowly faded, I started to feel human pain.

***

I woke up when I heard something fall down from the tree with a shriek. It was still dark.  I got up immediately and looked at the window. Looking down, I saw a woman, lying on her back. It was obviously her who fell down.

“A…are you okay?” I called out. She just whimpered. I went down the stairs and got out of the apartment.

I thought I was still dreaming. It was the woman in my dreams. It was the vision that I see when I felt like I’m in big trouble. She was very beautiful…

She was biting her lip to stop herself from sobbing in pain, her eyes watery, making me realize that that was not the time to appreciate her features.

“I… I’ll help you up!” I said in panic. It seemed like nothing was broken. I half-carried her inside and laid her down my bed.

“Are you okay?” I asked as I tried to clean her wounds. “What happened to you?”

“I… I fell…”

“What? What were you…?”

Our eyes met and I couldn’t help but blush. I avoided her gaze and continued cleaning her up. She smiled at me and said, “I’m glad,” taking my hand and patting it.

It was the same warmth that I always feel during the night before I went to bed. It puzzled me yet it also amazed me. She was just smiling softly at me.

She did not tell me where she came from or why she fell from that tree but I think I could really trust this mysterious person without questioning her. I just… felt like it. My heart’s beating really fast!

“Why don’t you change clothes?” I suggested. I ran away immediately and tried to look for some pajamas… or anything. I found a large nightgown that I don’t wear often and I brought it to her. Without any warning, she started to strip.

“Hey!”

“What?”

“Tell me beforehand before you undress yourself!” I shouted in a shrill voice as I was really embarrassed. I turned around and let her change.

“What do you think?” she asked. I turned around and I smiled because she looked cute when she’s anxious.

“Okay!” I commented. “Let’s sleep now,” I said.

I wanted to give her the bed since she had some injuries but as I started to prepare the futon on the floor, she said, “Why don’t you sleep on the bed too?”

“Eh?”

“It’s okay,” she said, pulling me forcefully on the bed. She smiled softly as she placed the thick blankets over me like a mother. I felt shy but I didn’t want her to see that I was so I hid half of my face under covers.

“What… what’s your name?” I asked for the first time.

“Sayaka…” she said as she looked at me.

“Sa…yaka…” I repeated. What a nice name! “My name is Sae…”

She just nodded in reply. Both of us were silent as we tried to sleep. Unexpectedly, the rain started to pour. It got colder and colder.

Surprising myself, I wrapped my arms around Sayaka, searching for more warmth. She instinctively patted my head. She had a nice scent. But more importantly, her warmth was really familiar, like she had been beside me ever since.

“Sayaka…” I said shyly.

“Yes?”

“I don’t know where you came from or what you are but I felt that I’ve met you before. I wish you’re the person who will stay beside me forever…” I said.

She smiled again, making me gulp. She kissed my forehead and faced me. “I will, Sae…”

I’m still confused whether Sayaka is an angel or a goddess… But all I know is that she’s the answer to my wishes and that she will be beside me forever.

She is both…


	2. Goddess Descends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Made as a continuation of "Goddess or Angel?"

Sae, who was used to just talking with her doll, had now gotten used to a new companion in her small flat. She woke up and stretched, but found the other side of the bed empty. However, the room was filled with the smell of rice cooking.

“Good morning, Sae,” someone greeted. That was one of the things that Sae had gotten used to since the arrival of her angel. No one greeted her in the morning.

“Ah…” she said, sitting up with a good mood. “Sayaka-chan… I thought I said you don’t have to cook!”

“Well, I want to try,” her new companion replied. Like an innocent child, she tried to live like how humans live. “I don’t want to be a burden to you.”

“Hmmm… but you’re not a burden,” she replied. She went to the kitchen, just a few paces away, and touched the taller girl’s exposed shoulder. “It’s cold…” she said, as she rubbed it.

The action made the angel feel uneasy and shy. She’s still foreign to these emotions and situations. “Ah, I’m finished,” she said, moving away.

“Hai!” Sae just replied, moving towards the table. Before it only had one chair but now, they could share. She happily ate her breakfast. “You’re becoming really good.”

“Thank you,” she said. “Umm…”

“Yes?”

“If you want, I can also work,” Sayaka said.

“Ah, no need!”

“But people need to work to live, right? People need to earn money…”

Sae nodded while looking at the bowl of rice. “Well, let’s see what we can do…” she said slowly. “You can go with me later…”

“Am I a bother?”

Sae shook her head. “Stop saying that. You know that I’m glad you’re here!”

Sayaka smiled. “I’ll do what I can to help!”

Letting the tall girl borrow some of her clothes, they set off. “Where are we going today?” she asked.

Sae just smiled and held her hand. Sayaka was used to following the girl as she walked towards her workplaces, hovering silently, being ignored. But now, even though she could not fly behind this person, her used-to-be-charge held her hand tight as they went through the crowd.

“We’re here…” Sae said. They stopped in front of a cute and cozy café. “My friend is the owner of this café so I decided to just work here for her.” They both entered the small shop. “Yo!” she greeted the owner. “Takamina, meet Sayaka…”

“Ah… nice to meet you,” the short girl bowed. Sayaka bowed in return.

Sae went near her and whispered, “Can she work here too?”

“No problem with me,” the girl immediately said. “We need more hands.”

“She’s not used to working though…”

“But I can learn quickly!” Sayaka interrupted. “Please, I wasn’t to help Sae…”

“Who is this girl?” Takamina asked her friend.

“She’s my angel…” Sae replied, looking at the oblivious lady who was standing by the door. She smiled and Sayaka replied a smile too.

The day in the shop started. Sae started cleaning and working in the kitchen while Sayaka was asked to wipe the tables, welcome the customers and take their orders.

“You learn fast,” the owner commented as Sayaka returned to the cash register. She just smiled in reply before she got the next set of orders.

A lot of people go to this café with different reasons: some are sad, some are celebrating, and some are lost. But the fallen angel loved this place since everyone who entered with darkness in their hearts left in peace. Sometimes she would look at a certain individual who was alone, talk a bit, and leave to do her other duties.

Takamina seemed to also like her presence there.

“It seems like you really enjoy working,” Sae said one time, sticking her head out of the small window where the orders come out. It was her 2nd week in the café.

“Ah, yes, I do,” she replied. “Being able to help others and them knowing your presence feels so good!” she said, confusing the short-haired girl.

“I’m glad. You seem brighter than those times when I leave you at home…”

“I’m glad that I can work with you… Sae…” she replied. The door chime rung and she left the post, welcoming the new customers.

Sae sighed as she looked at the slender back of her new (and hopefully lifetime) companion. Her heart was beating really fast and her stomach felt uneasy. Sometimes, she wondered what Sayaka’s purpose was, falling down that tree and into her life.

On their way home, Sae slowly and shyly held Sayaka’s hand, making her gasp in surprise. “You don’t like it?” she asked, about to let go.

“Ah, no…” the other girl replied, putting her other hand over their entwined fingers. “It’s okay, if it makes you more comfortable.”

Yes, it did make Sae feel comfortable. Yet Sayaka’s presence felt familiar, as though she had been walking with her ever since she could remember.

“Are you okay?”

“Yes, I’m just thinking… of some things…”

“You can share it to me,” Sayaka offered. Sae just shook her head and smiled, making the former uncomfortable. She just thought that her inability to read and know Sae’s thoughts made her an incompetent guardian before.

__“Do you regret it? Being human?”_ _

__Sayaka just shook her head. “As long as I know that she needs me.”_ _

__“Human hearts are so fickle, what if she finds someone else?”_ _

Sayaka woke up. Sae was sleeping silently beside her. She was thinking about her dream. What if Sae find someone she would be with? What would happen to her, who only existed for this person?

The thought made her sad. She smiled sadly and patted the younger one’s head before silently standing up from the small bed. She looked outside the window and looked at the beautiful moon absent-mindedly until she felt arms around her waist and a chin on her shoulder.

“Why are you awake?” Sae sleepily asked.

“I was just…” she started. “It’s nothing. Go to sleep now,” she said, helping the girl go back to bed and tucking her to sleep.

Once Sae was deep in slumber, she said, “I was wondering what will happen to me if you don’t need my presence anymore…”

***

It was a slow day in the café. Sayaka decided to go to the kitchen and help Sae clean and prepare.

The kitchen helper did not let her companion touch anything dangerous, fearing that she might get injured. “You just do this,” she said, pointing towards the washing counter. “You can cut the fruits, but please be careful, okay?”

“Hai.” She slowly walked towards the counter and started cutting the fruits and vegetables that were to be used later. Through the empty stainless shelves, she watched as Sae paced back and forth, busily doing her thing. She looked exhausted but happy at the same time. She was in a rush, but her mind was at ease.

“Ahh…” she said, as she realized that she had cut herself. Her voice was not too loud and she did not want to bother anyone by it, but clearly, Sae was actually observing her. The girl rushed, carrying a white napkin.

“Are you okay?” she asked, her face etched with worry.

Sayaka just nodded. “It’s nothing,” she said. But she was ignored. She looked at her two fingers that were cut and was actually amazed since it was her first time getting injured like that.

“Don’t just stand there!” Sae said, getting irritated. “Takamina!” she called the owner. “Can we get a day off? Sayaka’s injured.”

“Oh, I see,” she replied from the order window. “Okay. Please take care of Sayaka-chan.”

“But I said I’m okay,” Sayaka said, confused. Sae just wrapped her hand with the white napkin and pulled her out of the kitchen. “There’s no need to be like this.”

“Don’t be stubborn. Let’s go home!” Sae said, almost half-dragging her out of the café backdoor and back to the apartment.

As though her life was in great danger, Sae rushed to the bathroom to get the kit. Sayaka was made to sit on the bed as she waited.

“Ah, here,” Sae said, sitting on the floor. However, the kit was actually almost empty. “Ah, this sucks,” she said, her eyes watery. “I should have brought you to the clinic.” She was about to stand up when Sayaka just held her face to stop her.

“No, don’t be too alarmed,” she said, sensing the anxiousness of the other girl. “Don’t cry, Sae.”

“I… I… But you’re injured!”

“Shhh…” the angel said, pressing her injured finger on the other’s lips to silence her.

Sae, without thinking, held Sayaka’s hand, and sucked on the injured finger. The taller girl was shocked that she couldn’t do anything.

The girl who was kneeling on the floor stood up a bit to reach out and their foreheads touched. “I love you, Sayaka, and… I couldn’t understand it but I just… I just feel this…” She kissed her softly

 _ _“I… I don’t understand this feeling…”__ the fallen angel’s heart was beating too fast, her body ached and she felt sensations throughout her whole body that she had never felt before.

“Sae…”

“I love you… and I need you…” she whispered. Their fingers laced around each other’s and everything became a blur.

The goddess had already descended to the earth and there was no turning back.

__“Do you regret it? Being human?”_ _

__“No, because I know that she needs me… and I need her too…”_ _


End file.
